as close to new york as chicago can get

i was treated to a lovely lunch with colleagues of mine today on the dime of the university.
we went to tuscany where i ordered a coke as my drink.
the drinks arrived: a diet coke for him, a water with extra lemons and limes for her...a RUM AND COKE for me...ahh! what?!

susan: um, excuse me, I ordered just a coke. no rum.
waiter: yes, a RUM and coke. what you ordered! here!
susan: uhhh, no, you must have misheard, just a coke, please!
waiter: yes, here you go! RUM AND COKE for you!

i was horrified and embarrassed. here i am, out to a scholarly lunch with work colleagues who i hardly know, discussing topics and people i know nothing about, blatantly both the youngest and least experienced person by at least 6 years of education, not to mention years of age...and the waiter decides to announce (jokingly as we all realized 15 agonizing seconds later) that i ordered rum in my coke at my professional luncheon.

the waiter went on to attempt to take my plate half-way through the meal, refuse to let me box the remainder of the meal, offer to box the food and the plate together, and deny my professor's university credit card.
hilarious.



kinda like when i flew to california last week and on the morning flight out there i asked the flight attendant if she had any hot chocolate, and she somehow heard "alcohol" and started listing off the types of vodka they carried. all this at 8:30am while everyone else on the flight was drinking their apple and orange juices.



i am such an alcoholic.